Update

Hi readers,

It is nice to see there are some<grin>

I fairly well thought I might let go of the blog this last month.

Yet I am still receiving comments and my life seems dull without my normal times of posting about what I am learning and reflecting on.

I have been reflecting on how many do not understand what UC birthing is about. And how many would say it is a lack of care for the child. I have had some negative reactions and I am ‘feeling’ that no matter what choices I make for my family there will always be people that will not understand or appreciate what we are doing.

Just like anything else in life I can not live on my feelings. Presently I feel tired and depressed. I KNOW that will not last forever and I will get my energies and enthusiasm back but there is a sadness from not being understood and having so many ideals that I am reaching for. The bumps we just passed over the last few weeks have left some bruises. Healing comes.

AND yes, spring is just around the corner.

Please forgive the temporary barrenness here on the blog of the last month. I will revive and post again soon.

In my personal life I have been calling out to the Lord to make me a better wife and mother! And I expect to show fruit from this deep desire and the studies I have been doing.

Birthing a Quiverfull is more than birthing the unborn but raising him in the admonition of the Lord and showing the fruit of the Spirit in my daily walk and ministry to my family.

The mistakes I have made in the past must be confessed to have new insight on the future and to raise these children for the Lord.

I am rereading To Train Up a Child and Raising Your Child for Christ.

And Love and Respect, Creative Counterpart, Disciplines of Marriage, and Created to be His Helpmeet.

Please pray for me.

The Business of Being Born

For my birthday I viewed the film for the first time. Yes, I know it has been available for a long time… I was corresponding via email with others interested in childbirth when their areas were getting special screenings. All reasons I did not get too see it until now aside.

This was the time for ME to view The Business of Being Born

I came away from the documentary feeling very satisfied in my overall birthing experience. I have had five births and three miscarriages I undoubtedly have had diverse experiences. Though home midwifery care and cesarean section surgery are two experiences I have not had the film was helpful to me. Solidifying our philosophy of family birthing has been a journey and every bit of interaction with those that are passionate about childbirth adds to our education. I am grateful for this documentary that sums up the history of modern medicalized childbirth and shows the public some of the history of natural childbirth. Remember women have always given birth from the beginning. Natural childbirth has a long standing history that needs a documentaries of it’s own.

I also enjoyed seeing the faces and hearing the voices of many of the leading authors of books I have read.

For the surprise ending of Abby’s C-section birth of Matteo. Though some were critical of it I saw it as again another form of realistic education and am glad that it was included. Premature breech babies come into this world to find the medical establishment’s assistance needed!

Our QF Story

From before we married we were open to having children as the Lord gave them to us and purposed to avoid all chemical birth control. We had our first two children 16 months apart -very close together. Their conception was 5 months after marriage and 5 months after birth of first baby. I was called a ” fertile Mertle.” Everyone was surprised we ‘let conception happen’ especially because they were eventful pregnancies with hypermesis, pre-term labor, and bed-rest in the mix. We also were not financially stable and found ourselves moving more than once a year in search of an affordable living situation. Then at 18 months old our eldest boy lost all his early speech and our second son proved to be on the strong willed hyper side. All that to say we had more than the terrible twos to deal with. Nothing was easy -at one point I even found myself living in the upstairs rooms of an elderly friend -pregnant with a toddler, doing dishes in the bath tub, fighting the summer heat with no air-conditioning on an upper floor all day and night, laundry was being done at the laundry mat… my husband was trying to go to school and work and was not home much.
Finally my husband found a job that would support us okay and a townhouse apartment. We made the move but this left us with no local friends or relatives as it was many miles west of where we were from. This was the beginning of years of being pretty much alone in life accept for our relationship with the Lord.

We were using the barrier method ’sometimes’ after my second son -when we were stretched to our limits in all these circumstances. Finally we felt at ease and desired another baby very much- though things weren’t perfect. We became pregnant! But within the first week of recognizing the baby we lost him/her. We had decided we were so fertile that we needed to be in control when circumstances dictated! And now we were faced with the reality that we had little control of these things. If it were up to us we would not ever ‘loose’ a baby. We decided I must need to let my body heal and continued in use of barrier method for 3-4 months. In my frustration I thought maybe the Lord let that happen because we needed to make more of an effort to get out of the apartment living that was not ideal for raising a family. So we tried to make that happen and the Lord let many unusual things happen to postpone finding a home. We’d lost a deal on a house I had my heart set on! and finally we just gave up trying to control things -it wasn’t really what we ever wanted to do anyway. The circumstances kinda scared us into clinging to ‘being responsible’ and taking charge of our lives. We conceived again and delivered our first girl within a year of the miscarriage! Then and only then did the Lord make the way for our move to our first home. We then conceived our second daughter 5 months after our move. And this only happened because we listened to our hearts and the Lord not our emotions and circumstances.
As I type this while holding my eighth baby -the fifth to be in my arms. I realize that in those earlier days were lessons that we needed to be forced to go through. If we had not I doubt we would be so strongly QF minded. And I doubt we could have come through the last few years as close to the Lord -by far more trying years than our earlier marriage.
Looking at our life as a whole makes the reality of the Lord’s work in our lives powerful and enables us to let go of the tendency to try to control the future more easily.

To read more click here as I write more chapters about our journey.

Wearing My Baby

Studying how to use Jonathan's new fleece pouch.

I have had more success wearing my baby this time around.

I tried to always keep my babies close so with the first two I sat a lot with them or even snuggled in bed with them but as our family grew life did not afford that for us. After we experienced having to have Michalina our 3rd baby in a swing a lot -as we were moving and getting settled in to our home the year she was born I was really challenged with being the attachment parent I wanted to be! It was hard for both of us! I used the snuggly that I had since becoming a mom but after she got past 12 lbs. it hurt my shoulders and I had to limit it’s use.

When Sophia was born -my smallest baby of 6.5lbs. I tried a KangaCarrier Shirt in her earliest weeks – I found it hard to wrap the under cloth without help though. I used a ring sling and a snuggly but never found anything that was comfortable for both of us for consistent wearing. Then I did a lot of reading on the net and found many different options. I like the Rebozo and the Maya Wrap though I am enjoying this bundle of love made of fleece for this newborn stage. I was blessed by a very thoughtful Aunt with one as Jonathan’s birthday present! It is the most comfortable thing I have used for my shoulders and back and he is completely lulled to sleep in the warmth it provides. It also works as well for being able to have him in position for suckling leaving my hands free to do other small tasks.

Wear Your Baby.com is the best place for ideas for making your own baby carrier. Why not start experimenting now with what you have around the house. I plan on trying to use a sheet. I also found some material on clearance at Wal Mart for only .50 a yard that I think would be great for this summer.

I also came across a mom’s homemade instructions for making an ERGO type carrier out of a few things you already probably own. ERGOS seem to have a wonderful design but 100.00 is a bit pricey for some of us. And you  can’t nurse with an Ergo which is a must for my newborn.

More research on the net will give you an exhaustive flow of articles about the benefits of wearing your baby and even your toddler.

I think the benefits to the whole family outweigh the time invested in finding the best carrier for you and the struggles of the learning curve.

Have fun and take it slow as both you and your baby learn this great way to nurture your relationship!

Know when NOT to have a new learning experience for your baby.

Birth Stories

Here is a fellow blogger’s FREE ebook give-away. For a compilation of birth stories visit Journey Into Motherhood. Enjoy!

Breastfeeding Jonathan

Each baby and I have developed a unique breastfeeding relationship. Jonny and I are enjoying our special time together. I am learning what he needs and he is learning to be patient with me.

An infant patient? Well -yes. Sometimes I just want to hold him and ‘talk’ and he understands -at least for a little while.

He trusts that I will turn the talk to nourishment soon enough. Soft tones exchanged while gazing into his dark blue eyes and caressing his delicate face topped with soft velvety brown hair … a mother’s little piece of heaven on earth! I want to give back to him by offering his precious gold, his rich cream. It is mine to give and so it is his… others ask for it even cry for it but it is primarily his. Produced with love for Jonathan. He is mine and I am his.

Dear Lord thank you for this finely designed plan for me and my child. May we have many long months embracing all that you give us to share.

I am his he is mine

Postpartum – daily life goes on…

Photos of Life

In a world that celebrates DEATH, violence and immoral sexuality, looks for peace in politics and war efforts -a world that increasingly seeks to embrace the ’survival of the fittest’ attitude we also have the shinning light of LIFE and birth.

We have the beauty of creation all around us. With each season we have lovely things to dwell upon and enlighten us toward LIFE. The gifts of living plants and creatures upon this earth constantly bring forth new life and replenish our souls as we witness those everyday miracles.

Human LIFE wrought in the womb of woman in all of LIFE’S splendid intricacies shines Love,Hope, and Grace upon mankind. The source of all LIFE being in the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. With the conception of faith we see the New Birth in the hearts of every man we see LIFE ETERNAL ever before us.

We can continue on through all circumstances with HIS light showing forth the way

Our First Month With Five

Our first month has flown by as life just doesn’t slow down as much as one would like to soak up those special first days and weeks.

I do however cherish the time I have had to just BE with Jonathan.

He loves to nurse and isn’t as much a ’sleepy’ baby as he started out being. He will gaze at us as we hold him and he will grasp my clothing or hand while nursing -his favorite activity.

It has been trying to get into a routine and I have been sometimes wanting to escape emotionally from the pressure of being a mom of five. Each one has individual needs. Needs that I don’t always feel up to fulfilling.

I am needing to remind myself to pray often and be more willing to wait on the answers for the next step.

Where do the hours go each day and am I doing the best for them that I can?

Is Jonathan getting all that he needs? He is gaining weight slowly still just under his birth weight. I am praying about what I can do to help him plump up and cry less. I do keep him near me as much as possible with a Rebozzo wrap. I plan on using more time to experiment with baby wearing and nursing as I work or teach the children their lessons. I keep feeling like I want to say we’ll just wait for x,y,z until he is bigger but you know the others can’t wait they need to be kept busy with age appropriate things or they truly regress. I put off blogging for the last month and I found today giving my time to catching up with journaling that I have a MUCH better perspective on our home and priorities. I mustn’t let go of the things that enrich my marriage and parenting. So I pray for whatever the new balance should be and wait for the next step. I will finish the birth story this weekend and that will bring back the sweet remembrance of bringing yet another beautiful being into this world.

What has been done is done…

I am disappointed about the election outcome but not surprised.

I do however believe that we as a country are on a very slippery slope and will continue down that slope at a rapid pace if more do not seek the Lord and have a change of heart!

It is now a time to uphold the sanctity of life like never before.

I happen to view the film Amazing Grace last night.

The work of William Wilberforce was amazing!

Let us raise up a new generation that has the heart of God on the matters of LIFE and DEATH! Let us take these matters very seriously!

This mother’s heart responded this way -by becoming a Voice.

How will your heart respond? How will mine?

This article struck me even after the votes were final!

LORI’S WORDS OF WARNING
by
Lori Kalner, as told to Bodie Thoene

Dear Friends:
Lori Kalner asked me to help her pass this message to you. These are Lori’s
final words of warning as the choice of Life and Death is before our American
nation.

“Dear Ones, you know the Word of God in the Bible is alive. In my life I
have been constantly amazed at how daily scripture readings always form a
perfect fit, as the Lord’s instructions and warnings relate to great world events.
My task (and yours) is to then recognize our personal responsibilities as
Christians.
I have seen and experienced how the apathy of Christians destroyed my
homeland and the world. I am amazed now that so many American Christians could be
still undecided about how they should vote.
Now the Lord speaks to every American Christian. Will they listen?
My father (a German Evangelical Pastor) taught me by example that the voting
booth is a sacred altar where a Christian bares his true heart before the
Lord. I have said this to you many times. Papa was among the few German
Christians who did not vote for, and spoke against, Herr Hitler. For this stand he
lost everything on earth, yet trusted in the Lord’s promise, “Great will be
your reward in heaven.”
How well will American Christians remember what is at stake? Not only their
nation, but their souls. Their Constitution. Their children’s instruction in
schools. Freedom to speak publicly without fear of reprisal. Freedom to ask
a question.

(*Bodie’s note: Lori was quite upset by the investigation and humiliation of
Joe the Plumber and the ABC news reporter in Florida)

It is undeniable truth that the Holocaust against European Jewry began with
eugenics…choosing who was worthy to live and who would die. Abortion…
sterilization…euthanasia to eliminate the disabled “useless eaters.”
Much of this America already participates in.

Silence when evil is practiced is participation in evil.
When it was over for Germany, and the nation was burned with fire and turned
to rubble, the Germans who pretended to be Christians said, “We did not know.
”
But I tell you, the German church did indeed know!

And you in the church in America also know what is happening in your
country. Christ is now outlawed in public places. You have elected men and women
who profane the Name of Christ by claiming to follow Him while they enact
laws to murder the innocent.

(* Bodie’s note: check the pro-abortion votes of: Obama, Joe Biden, Nancy
Pelosi, Harry Reid, Barney Frank)

And now Americans believe the political propaganda that this American
election is about the economy? (The same lies were told by the Nazis; blaming
Jewish bankers for the German financial downturn.)
I tell you, rather, there are spiritual absolutes at work here. The famine
of a bad economy has come upon America because of the mass genocide of
abortion.

(*Bodie’s note: 48 million U.S. infant deaths by abortion since Roe v.
Wade)

I tell you plainly, Americans are not following Christ if they vote for this
Obama who has voted for the murder of the unborn…and infanticide….
I warn you clearly: destruction and misery will come upon America if
Christians let this happen. And in eternity they will be held accountable before
the throne of the Righteous Judge for what they do and what they do not do.
Every innocent baby aborted is like a murdered child of Bethlehem as Herod
seeks to kill the Christ Child. (Those who vote for Obama the abortionist have
chosen the Kingdom of Herod over the Kingdom of Christ.) Silence and
political inaction is not an option for a true follower of Christ.

You Christian cannot ever say, “We did not know. We were not warned.”

Brave pastors, priests, and bishops have now sounded the clear call for
every believer to choose Life. Those pastors who follow Obama are false shepherds
and will be accountable and judged by God.

May your heart be filled with compelling urgency to do the will of Christ by
voting for LIFE!

I speak for those who have no voice,
Lori Kalner (as told to Bodie Thoene)